“If thy brother, the son of thy mother, or thy son, or thy daughter, or the wife of thy bosom, or thy friend, which as thine own soul, entice thee secretly, saying, Let us go and serve other gods, which thou hast not known, thou, nor thy fathers;

Of the gods of the people which round about you, nigh unto thee, or far off from thee, from the one end of the earth even unto the other end of the earth;

Thou shalt not consent unto him, nor hearken unto him; neither shall thine eye pity him, neither shalt thou spare, neither shalt thou conceal him:

But thou shalt surely kill him; thine hand shall be first upon him to put him to death, and afterwards the hand of all the people.

And thou shalt stone him with stones, that he die; because he hath sought to thrust thee away from the LORD thy God, which brought thee from the house of bondage.”

( Continue.. )

 

Bloody hell.

Ok, so today, I kind of got in an accident. It was stupid, there wasn't really much damage, but it wasn't a nice experience, and a totally unnecessary at that.
I'll explain;
I was driving back from the CCL, with my mom, because I hadn't driven that long route and was feeling tired that morning and also for the appointment there - to talk about this year and what I was going to do, turn plans into action etc. etc. - asked her to come with me. Anyhow, on the way back we got at this rotary intersection, and I had read the sign before saying that to get on the freeway to where I live, I had to go right. So, I turned the signal light on, looked around, and turned left. When I was making the turn towards the acceleration lane, my mother suddenly made a very loud alarming shriek and screamed; "NO!!!" Now, in those two seconds, I thought I must have been doing something very horrifically wrong and dangerous for her to react that way, and from the corners of my eyes I only saw the signs "go back". So in those short seconds I concluded that we were in immediate danger because I had driven up the wrong end of the freeway lane thing or something like that (a la blind sider). I turned the wheel to the left and hit the break. Ended up on this lifted section between the two roads, right at the edge of the rotary. Unfortunatly there was this small bollard(?) pole thing, which I completely smashed to the ground. We were standing rather secure there, entirely off the road, but after that, when I looked around, I found out that the reason my mother reacted so intense.. was because I apparently took the wrong turn (just the wrong freeway, not the wrong lane). =_= Now..that wouldn't have been a big deal at all, because I could've just gotten off at the next exit and go back again.
It still kind of upsets me, that it happened. That she had such a reaction, for something so insignificant, especially next to a driver who has only gotten her licence one month. She does it more often, those kind of out of place reactions, and normally I can deal, but this time her panic kind of caught up with me. :(

What I'm bummed about mostly, is that the car does have some damage that needs to be repaired. I accept that because I was behind the wheel, I am responsible. My reaction was also very intense where it wasn't needed, though I can easily reason why I reacted that way, and that makes that I can easily accept that too. But it was still my reaction. It just..makes me sad that this was totally unnecessary, that it would've never happened if I hadn't taken my mom with me, because I was tired and wanted to make sure I would drive this complicated route safely. She just..does it more often, and I warned her about it before, especially when I'm in the car. I don't have that much experience, so ofcourse, when someone sitting beside you with more than twenty years of experience on you reacts like that, you respond to it. At least I did. And it just..dunno, pains me to learn that apparently I really can't rely on that she is older, wiser, stronger. But maybe I'm just being a twat. She can't really help how she reacted at that time just as much as I couldn't. Although..there is still a difference. A difference I wish would have mattered.

It seems like the older I get, the more I learn that that difference I thought was there when people are older and more experienced, is often so painfully relative.

Meh, it's such a stupid situation. We talked about it and it's okay now. But I'm just kind of disappointed. In myself for not..relying on my myself in that moment. And in my mom, for..well, I think it's obvious. The conclusion just makes me feel like shit, because I wish she would keep me from harm, in stead of the other way around, like parents should?

Blablabla, I feel like such a hypocritical wanker sometimes.

Thanks for reading, and hugs~ (btw, thanks for the comments on my previous post, I'll get to them tomorrow, promise)
Jub